Puppy on the Plane

Before catching the plane home at the end of an out-of-town business trip, a man bought a small puppy as a present for his son.  Since he didn't have time to complete the necessary paperwork for taking the puppy on board, he slid it down the front of his pants and sneaked it on board the plane.  About half an hour into the trip, the flight attendant noticed the man shaking and quivering.

"Are you OK, sir?" She asked.

"Yes, I'm fine," said the man.

Twenty minutes later, the flight attendant couldn't help noticing the man was moaning and shaking again.

"Are you sure you're all right, sir?"

"Yes," said the man, "but I do have a confession to make.  I didn't have time to ge the paperwork to bring a puppy on board, so I hid himdown the front of my pants."

"What's wrong?" asked the flight attendant.  "Isn't he housetrained?"

"It's not that," said the man, "The problem is he isn't weaned yet!"

These classifieds actually ran in a Minneapolis newspapers - a smile for your day....

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES...
Mother, AKC German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog..able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat. Been out a while.
Better be a big reward.



COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.

NORDIC TRACK
$300 Hardly used, call Chubby.

GEORGIA PEACHES
California grown - 89 cents/lb.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer $300.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.


And the best one?:

FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last month. Wife knows everything.

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